115. Acceptance
How did we get to where we are now?
By learning to accept.
Accepting what we will tolerate and what we won't.
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We don't have to hit rock bottom, we're allowed to want something different and we can CHOOSE to improve our lives from this point onwards.
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Transcript
Hello, darling heart, and welcome to the drink less, live better podcast.
-:This is the podcast that helps you to see that drinking less doesn't need to be stressful, lonely, or boring.
-:I'm your host, Sarah Williamson, and I decided to have a year alcohol free as a little life experiment and haven't looked back.
-:With my experience and training, I now help other people with their alcohol free or drink less adventures.
-:You can find out more and sign up to my 5 day drink less challenge at drink less live better.com.
-:I'm here to tell you that you can relax, connect, and have fun without alcohol in your life.
-:Join me here each week to find out how.
-:Last week, I mentioned that my book is being published in July.
-:It's still making me feel sick to say those words out loud.
-:I don't know why I'm having a problem with claiming the word, the title, author, because I am already an author.
-:I have loads of work published in the world.
-:Maybe by next week, I'll feel more comfortable about it.
-:The second theme in my book is acceptance.
-:Last week, I talked about awareness and how that is often the first step along the road to making a change, and today I'd
-:like to talk about what we can acknowledge or accept and therefore tolerate or not.
-:Life has a funny way of not always turning out how we might envisage it.
-:We often find ourselves facing situations or circumstances that don't align with our expectations, leaving us feeling frustrated, disappointed, or maybe even heartbroken.
-:Things are less than ideal from time to time.
-:Sometimes, the key to finding contentment lies in our ability to accept or not life's imperfections.
-:The first step towards acceptance is acknowledging our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
-:We can reflect on our expectations and values and find where the disconnects lie.
-:It's essential to give ourselves permission to feel and express our dissatisfaction, take some time to what specifically isn't
-:working for you and explore why it bothers you.
-:By understanding the root of our discontentment, we can gain clarity on our desires and the gap between reality and our ideal vision.
-:Choosing to drink less or have a break from alcohol is one that we may come to quite quickly or that we may have been thinking about for a while.
-:In my case, it was a decision I arrived at two and a half years after thinking about it. Ah, yes. The thinking place.
-:That place where we know change is coming, but we haven't quite accepted it yet. The liminal space.
-:Go back and listen to episode 27 if you haven't heard it.
-:In fact, go back and listen again even if you have.
-:Once we've acknowledged our feelings, it's time to shift our perspective.
-:Consider reframing situation and viewing it from a different angle.
-:Often, what initially appears as a setback or disappointment can present an unforeseen opportunity, perhaps for growth or maybe self discovery.
-:Embrace the idea that life's detours might lead to new and unexpected places.
-:I came to the decision that alcohol was taking more from me emotionally, physically, and spiritually than it was giving.
-:The small window of pleasure that alcohol used to give me was more and more outweighed by the negative, but accepting this was hard.
-:The impact that alcohol was having on my relationships with my children and other people in my life was becoming more and more apparent.
-:I would never have admitted this to you at the time. Of course, I wouldn't.
-:I wanted to focus on justifying my behavior, but not anymore.
-:Mostly peaceful acceptance of what went before so that I can move on today.
-:I came to accept that whatever other people were thinking wasn't my business.
-:I worried and worried about how my decision not to drink was going to be taken by other people, and it's only now that I can say none of that stuff matters.
-:The decision is yours, and it's for you.
-:Accepting you are enough of a reason might take some getting used to, but it is so worth it.
-:Oh, and by the way, you are not broken.
-:You might be wrestling with what you are getting ready to do next, but never ever think that you are the problem. Alcohol is the problem.
-:You are okay exactly as you are, and you will be in the future.
-:It helped me to remember one of the biggest obstacles to acceptance was my desire for control.
-:We often cling to our expectations attempting to mold life according to our wishes.
-:However, true acceptance requires letting go of the need to control every outcome.
-:Understand that some things are beyond our influence and that's okay.
-:Embrace the concept of surrendering to the flow of life.
-:We are in control of our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, but very little else.
-:By relinquishing control, we open ourselves up to new possibilities.
-:Acceptance does become easier when we connect with others who share similar experiences or perspectives.
-:Seek out supportive communities, friends, mentors, or coaches who can provide guidance and empathy during challenging times.
-:Engaging in open conversations about our struggles and sharing our stories can be therapeutic and remind us that we're not alone in our journey. Remember, acceptance doesn't mean giving up.
-:It means finding strength in vulnerability and forging connections that help us navigate life's uncertainties.
-:Do bear in mind how far you've come.
-:You are not who you were 10 years ago, and you are not who you were last month. You are changing. We all are. We're human beings. We're supposed to.
-:When somebody says, you've changed, we should see it for the glorious compliment it is. Recognize how far you've come already.
-:And one final point, if you are accepting of what you want to change, be it alcohol or anything else in your life, get ready
-:for action because if not now, then when?
-:Please check out the show notes on this or any other episode.
-:You'll see the link to a hidden podcast episode to help you with your 5 PM craving cravings, and you'll be able to read about my one to one coaching program.
-:You can also find the link to sign up and hear about the book launch. Thank you for listening in today.
-:Come back again next week, and PS, I believe in you.
