28. Fixed mindset vs Growth mindset

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Hello darling heart and welcome to the Drink Less Live Better podcast. This is the podcast that helps you to see that less

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doesn't need to be stressful, lonely, or boring. I'm your host Sarah Williamson, and I decided to have a year alcohol free

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as a little life experiment and haven't looked back. With my experience and training I now help other women with their alcohol

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free or drink less adventures. I'm here to tell you that you can be truly joyful without alcohol in your life. Join me here

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each week to find out how. How you think affects what you get. In the last episode, I talked about the liminal space, how

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we can think of the void of stuckness, the messy middle, the walking through treacle, that sometimes uncomfortable place,

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renamed and reframed as where we are meant to be right now with the much nicer liminal space title. Whilst I accept that the

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liminal space might feel frustrating, it is a place of opportunity, change, and growth. I still want to feel like I'm making

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progress even if I'm far from perfect right now. So how can we do this? Have you heard of a fixed mindset versus growth mindset?

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Someone with a fixed mindset believes their intelligence, talents, and abilities are set qualities or traits. On the other

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hand, someone with a growth mindset understands that learning, practicing and persistence can be developed. Let's look at

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an example. Some one with a fixed mindset might say something like, I'm lucky, I'm good at sport. And someone with a growth

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mindset might say something like, I'm trying a few different sports, I haven't found my passion yet. Hang on a sec, Did you

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catch the most important word in that last sentence? Yes. Correct. Yet. Yet is such a beautiful word. In our moments of learning,

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practising, persisting in the liminal space use the yet. I cannot learn this yet. I cannot get the hang of this yet. This

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isn't sticking yet. Ah, beautiful. We're growing. We're seeing the possibility in our future. It's not now, but we're heading

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towards our vision. Let's try some others. I don't know how versus I can learn how. I can't make this better versus I can

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find ways to improve. I don't like challenges versus challenges lead to growth. Other people are better at this than me versus

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what can I learn from them? When we are motivated to embrace challenges or new ways of being, we risk possible failure, and

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avoiding a challenge prevents that possible failure. We might be trying to protect ourselves. Let's ask what's the worst that

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can happen? Is the answer so bad? Can you go ahead anyway? We can decide to accept that failures are part of our growth. Try

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to see them as temporary setbacks and perhaps even necessary in the pursuit of goals worth aiming for. Don't give up, setbacks

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might just turn out to be your stepping stones. Can you look around you and see other people's success as a source of inspiration?

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Don't feel any threat or jealousy. Allow good feelings to flow through you when you see someone else has a bit of what you'd

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like. Know that because somebody else is being, doing, or having what you'd like, you can be, do, or have it too. They've

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found a way that works for them and there'll be a way for you. Can you ask for help, support or feedback? See this as a part

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of your journey. Don't ever feel in any way less than if you need a hand. In this life we rise by lifting each other. Someone

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further ahead will have been where you are and hopefully they will remember what it feels like and can offer you what you

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need to move forward. Let's recap what will help us. Number 1, remove that fixed mindset inner voice. I cannot do this versus

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I cannot do this yet. Number 2, know and believe that you can improve. Our brains were designed to learn. Number 3, practice

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and be persistent. Number 4, see setbacks as temporary, not a whole world of disaster. Disaster. Number 5, use other people

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as a source of inspiration and support. Now, I'd just like to take a moment to recognize that as in many areas of life, this

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isn't black and white, and we tend not to be a 100% fixed or a 100% growth minded. Of course, we're a mix of both. I'd urge

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you to straighten your back, wiggle your shoulders down a bit and remember the magic word 'yet' next time you're feeling a

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bit stuck. It's just possible it'll get you moved along your path another step or 2, and if we're heading in the right direction

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of our dreams that can only be a good thing, can't it? Oh, and you know I always sign off my podcast by telling you I believe

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in you, it's because I do. You might not see your potential for change in a given moment, but I see it. I see you, and I believe

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in you. Thank you for listening to this episode. Please listen in again next time. You can sign up to my 5 day drink less

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experiment and find out about working with me one to 1 at drink less live better.com. I'd love it if you could 5 star rate

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this podcast and leave me a review. All that shizzle helps. You know? Thank you. And PS, I believe in you.