239. What are you holding on to?

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Hello and welcome back to the Drink Less Live Better podcast. I'm Sarah Williamson.

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Follow me on Instagram For a bit of inspiration, check out my website to download resources and read my book for insights and Drink Less Live Better Related.

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I have coaching spots open at the moment.

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Pop me an email if you'd like more information.

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Ok, let's get on with today's episode. What are you holding too tightly?

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Most of us have got things that we're attached to and some of them are working out well for us. Some of them not so much.

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It could be a relationship, an identity, or an expectation about how life should and look.

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And the tighter we grip, the more drained, rigid and stuck we might feel in those things or circumstances.

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Today I want to talk to you about five ways to loosen that grip a bit, to release what doesn't feel good anymore, and to make some space for what does. Let's start with this.

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Why do we hold on when letting go might be a better option? Well, it might be about security.

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Our brains are wired to seek stability, even when stability means holding onto things that aren't working out okay, like drinking for example.

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Or maybe it's the job that exhausts us, but it pays for the bills.

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Maybe it's a friendship that feels one sided, but it's familiar.

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Or maybe it's an old story about who we think we're supposed to be and to move away from from that would be deeply uncomfortable.

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Holding tightly is a form of control.

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It's a bit like saying if I just keep this in place, maybe I won't have to face the unknown, but there will be a cost.

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Control keeps us rigid and rigidity makes it hard for joy, creativity and new opportunities to show up.

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Okay, lets explore a few tips for releasing what doesn't feel so good anymore. Tip number one let's name it.

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Honestly, you can't let go of something if you can't see it clearly. This is about awareness.

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Have you read my book Drink Less, Live Better?

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The first part is all about awareness.

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Can you name that thing you're holding onto?

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If you can't, then you won't be able to let go. Write it down. Speak it out loud.

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There's something liberating about seeing it in black and white.

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You may realise you're clinging to an identity like always being the strong one, or to a belief like I really have to succeed at everything.

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Once you name it, it starts to lose its power. Number two, lets notice the cost.

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Sometimes we hang on because we only see what we'd lose if we Let go.

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But what's the cost of holding on?

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Maybe it's your peace of mind, your energy, or your self respect. Write those costs down.

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Put them side by side with what you think you're gaining. The truth often reveals itself.

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Here we realize the grip costs more than it gives.

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Number three Practice small ways of letting go.

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You don't need to leap into radical change. Start with small acts of loosening.

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If you're holding tightly to busyness, try blocking off one scheduled hour this week.

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If you're gripping onto resentment, experiment with releasing one small grievance just for today.

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These micro practices train your nervous system to feel safe in letting go.

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Little by little, over time, the muscle of release grows a bit stronger. 4. Create some space for the unknown.

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Letting go often means facing empty space.

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That's a solid reason as to why so many of us resist it. But emptiness isn't failure, it's possibility.

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Try creating literal space in your environment. Clear out a drawer. Donate a bag of clothes.

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Sit in silence for five minutes without filling it with noise or distraction.

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That physical spaciousness mirrors the emotional spaciousness you're creating.

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It reminds you the unknown isn't something to worry about, it's something to welcome.

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Number five Anchor in what feels good.

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Is it practices, people or habits that you want to feel aligned.

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This isn't about replacing one tight grip with another.

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But the more you fill your life with what feels good, the less tempting it becomes to hold on to what doesn't. Okay, let's have a recap. What are you desperately hanging onto? Here we go. Can you name it? Honestly, can you notice the cost?

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Can you practice some micro letting go?

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Can you create some space for the unknown?

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And can you lock in on what feels good?

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Letting go won't be a single event, a one and done. It's practice.

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Some days you'll notice your grip tightening again, and that will be okay. The awareness itself is progress.

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The invitation is to keep softening, to keep noticing, to keep allowing life to flow through you instead of trying to control every bit. Thank you for listening in today.

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Check out the show notes for resources and ways to work with me.

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I've also hidden a podcast episode there.

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Oh, and P S I believe in you.