223. Don't lose this moment by searching for another

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Hello darling heart, and welcome to this episode of the Drink Less Live Better podcast.

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This is the podcast that helps you to see that drinking less doesn't need to be stressful, lonely or boring.

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I'm your host Sarah Williamson and I decided to have a year alcohol free as a little life experiment and and haven't looked back.

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I'm here to support you with your alcohol free or drink less adventures. Follow me on Instagram at drinklesslivebetter.

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Find resources on my website drinklesslivebetter.com I hope you enjoy listening to this episode today. Let's get straight to it.

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Don't lose this moment by searching for another.

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I think we've probably all experienced this, but rarely talk about it.

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That restless habit of searching for the next perfect moment while completely missing the one we're living in right now. Let's see.

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You're sitting with a friend over coffee, having a genuinely good conversation, but part of your mind is already scanning

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ahead, wondering if you should suggest grabbing dinner or maybe catching that movie later.

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Or whether your kids need a lift to football tomorrow. Does that sound familiar?

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We live in a time of endless options.

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Dating apps promise someone better with the next swipe.

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Social media shows us highlight reels of experiences we're not having.

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Even Netflix asks us if we want to keep on watching or try something new.

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We've been trained to optimise, to upgrade, to always be seeking the next best thing over there.

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But the moment you're in right now, it's not a placeholder.

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It's not the opening act for your real life.

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This moment, this conversation, this cup of tea, this quiet evening at home, this walk around the block.

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These aren't the spaces between the good things. These are the good things.

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I wonder how many conversations I've only half experienced, how many sunsets I've photographed instead of actually watched.

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How many moments I've treated as stepping stones to somewhere else.

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There's this beautiful concept in psychology called

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hedonic adaption. The idea that we quickly return to a baseline level of happiness despite positive events.

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We think the next job, the next relationship, the next holiday will be the thing thing that makes us happy. But research shows we adapt.

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And then we're back to searching again.

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The antidote isn't to stop having goals or dreams.

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It's just to recognise that fulfilment isn't a place to get to.

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It can be right here, right now.

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It's learning to be fully present with what's actually happening, not what could be happening or what's happening next.

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This doesn't mean settling for less or accepting situations that genuinely aren't working.

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It means distinguishing between the voice that says this isn't enough out of restlessness versus the voice that says it out of genuine discontent.

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Sometimes the best thing we do is decide that where we are is exactly where we need to be.

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Not forever, but for right now, to let this moment be complete on its own terms.

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I started practicing something I call moment anchoring.

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When I catch myself mentally fast forwarding, I ask what would I notice if I decided this moment was actually perfect as it is?

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Usually I discover something I'd been overlooking.

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The way the morning light hits the wall.

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The sound of my kids laughing in the next room.

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The simple satisfaction of completing a task on my list, the most beautiful moment anchors are bliss.

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They elicit a feeling of deep connectedness, fun or lightness.

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When we stop frantically searching for the next great moment, we often discover the ordinary moments have been extraordinary all along.

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The best experiences aren't always the ones we plan and anticipate.

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They're often the ones that surprise us.

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Three things to think about today first, practice the art of enough not settling, but recognising when something is genuinely sufficient.

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Your current job might not be your dream job, but if it's decent and pays the bills, can you find ways to appreciate it while you work towards something better?

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Your home might not be your dream home, but can you make it feel comfortable instead of just a temporary stop? Second, distinguish between restlessness and intuition.

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Sometimes that feeling of there must be something else is just our anxiety about being still.

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But sometimes it's genuine guidance pointing us towards a change we do need to make.

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Learn to tell the difference by exploring the feeling instead of immediately acting on it and rushing to the next thing.

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Third, remember that being present is a practice, and it might not happen perfectly. You'll still get distracted.

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You'll still plan ahead and wonder, what if that's human?

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The goal isn't to never think about the future.

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It's to notice when you're doing it and gently return to right now.

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The moments you're searching for, they're not hiding in some other place or time. They're available.

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They are here in this life that you're living.

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The next thing, the next moment is not guaranteed to us.

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So right here, right now, is all that matters. Thank you for listening in today. Come back again next week.

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Check out the show notes for a link to a hidden podcast episode that will help you with your 5pm cravings and details about

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my one to one life coaching and sober coaching programs. And P.S. i believe in you.