23. Finding joy in my alcohol-free world

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Hello darling heart and welcome to the drink less live better podcast this is the podcast that helps you to see that drinking

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less doesn't need to be stressful lonely or boring. I'm your host Sarah Williamson and I decided to have a year alcohol free

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as a little life experiment and haven't looked back. With my experience in training I now help other women with their alcohol

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free or drink less adventures. I'm here to tell you that you can be joyful without alcohol in your life. Join me here each

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week to find out how. Today I'd like to tell you a story about how I found joy in my alcohol free world. I was somewhere in

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between never drinking and severe alcohol misuse in that grey area. I don't know which end of the scale I was on and I don't

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care. I could easily do a dry January or a sober October and I could go Sunday to Wednesday without a drink, but when I relaxed

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at home at the weekend or went out with my girlfriends I binge drank. Now, let's get clear on binge drinking here. The UK

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government guidelines define binge drinking as drinking more than 6 units in a session, and that equates to 2 large glasses

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of wine. So when I was sitting in the pub with my girlfriends thinking I'm all sophisticated, elegantly sipping 2 glasses

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of wine and no more, I was binge drinking. Anyway, less about that grey area and more about the Technicolor Joyful Rainbow.

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I wasn't not living a jolly life. Excuse the double negative but it's true. Everything was okay, well better than okay actually.

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Everything was going well A lovely husband, gorgeous kids, nice house, dog, friends, extended family, job, all of the things.

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Did you hear that? I said that in capitals. All the things. All the things that make a person happy don't they? I was happy

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but I had an underlying feeling of unease, a niggle, a deep sense that things could be better than they were but I could not

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put my finger on why. So I did what any sane and rational person would do in an already full life, I added more. More to do,

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more to be, more to remember, more to make time for, and more to pay for. I added yoga because all yogis are enlightened.

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I added green smoothies because they make you beautiful. I added meditation because who is more zen and happier than a Buddhist

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monk? I added vitamins because somebody told me to, although they didn't mention that they only work if you take them and

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you don't leave them sitting on your kitchen countertop. I added running because, well, that's a surefire way to move you

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further away from your problem physically, and all the problem solving ideas didn't solve the problem, and that's because

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I didn't need to add anything else into my life, I just needed to take one thing away. I decided I'd do away with alcohol

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for a year and was sure this would lead to a further sense of dissatisfaction because I was clearly going to spend a year

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being bored, miserable and lonely. I had no idea what was to come. Now let's be quite clear at this point, when I stopped

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drinking the clouds did not immediately part and rained down magical unicorns, rainbows in golden glitter. No, there wasn't

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an immediate stratospheric rise to the top of the emotion scale. However, that feeling of unease did dissipate. The low level

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brain fog, the rumbling anxiety, all lifted over time. I hadn't noticed how much I had been entertaining negative thought

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patterns and voices passionate about my alcohol free experiment, and I sought out like minded people who were totally happy

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and comfortable about their life choice. I got into enjoyed conversations, connections and collaborations in my newfound passion.

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I spent more time in real life with the people who made me happy. I changed my socialising habits. Coffees, brunches and dog

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walks became the norm. I bought colour back into my wardrobe. I stopped wearing grey every day and chose bright colours instead.

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I bought house plants and didn't kill them. I exercised. I got outside. I started helping and supporting other people. Instead

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of pursuing happiness externally, I found it started creeping up on me. I began to feel it deeply within myself when I wasn't

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looking for it. As I got further and further away from my last drink and the anxiety subsided, I found it easier and easier

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to connect with my higher vibe feelings. Where I had simplified my life a bit and made time for what was really important

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to me, I found joy in a good book, an hour of sewing or painting, a long bath or an excellent cup of tea. When the tough stuff

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is happening around me, I try to see the good bits in the situation. I had 4 visits to hospital in 6 days last week, but I

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chose to focus on the shared drives to and back with my son, the easy access to transport, the lovely hospital we go to, the

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nice staff we see. I don't ignore the bad stuff. I just don't give it the energy I would have done years ago. No drama, thank

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you. I'm done with drama. So there you have it. Joy, for me, it's an inside job. It was taking our call away and seeing all

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the good stuff that was there for the recognizing and making. Thank you for listening to this episode. Please listen in again

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next time. You can sign up to my 5 day drink less experiment and find out about working with me one to 1 at drink less live

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better dot com. I'd love it if you could 5 star rate and review this podcast. It'd make me as happy as Farrell Williams if

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you did. Thank you and PS, I believe in you.